So much has been written on this topic, and people are still saying things which range from absurd to dangerous. A great American said, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Every time I see a new self defense article, I feel like I am being sold a pound of cure.
“What to do when you have been put in a head lock”
“How to get out of an arm bar”
“Escaping the rear bear hug”
I am not saying that is bad information or useless information. What I will say is those are tactics, not a strategy. The tactics of fighting is not the same thing as the strategy of staying out of fights.
If someone is currently looking to learn to better safeguard their life, these are incorrect starting points. Learning those may help you feel better walking out the door at the Mc Dojo. You may feel excitement when you get home to show your partner your new found trick. You may even have a little more confidence in your step when you go back to your favorite watering hole. None of those indicate you actually are any more capable of staying out of trouble or knowing what to do if you find yourself in it.
Looking at violence from a wide scope, it seems there are three types of incidents which we can broadly group them into:
-Crimes of opportunity
-Crimes which are your fault
-True Asocial violence
Opportunity is the breeding ground for the largest percentage of crime in the world. Create the setting for a crime to occur, and it seems to occur: Your wallet was stolen out of your car after you left the car door unlocked, your house was burglarized after you allowed the front hedges to grow too high, and left the lights out…. the examples go on and on. A lot of violent incidents involve the victim playing a substantial role in enabling and enacting the crime. I suppose in a higher level way we are all responsible for enabling a lot of the crime in the world with our global apathy and indifference…but that is another topic.
Next I think a lot of crimes related to violence are directly associated to the victim being fucking stupid.
Are you friends with Tim Larkin of Target Focus Training Group on facebook? Tim often posts videos of assaults to illustrate the grave difference between many peoples imaginary land ideas of violence and cold reality. In a huge majority of them, you see the victim plays an active role in escalating the incident. Allow me to provide a recent example of how deadly violence can be, and how the victim enabled their own assault…
In Australia 2011: Man #1 (victim) was in a bar, man #2 (defendant) was drinking. #2 gave #1 “the eye”, and made some comments. The two men argue, and then #2 who “started” it gets up to leave. As he is walking out of the front door man #1 runs up behind him and starts yelling at #2, standing directly behind him with his hands in his pockets. #2 throws back an elbow, catching #1 in the face. #1 falls head first backwards and splits his melon on the concrete. This incident was captured on a security camera.
So man #1 is dead. Man #2 is going to court, and probably going to jail. From where I am standing, this violent incident is a purely victim driven incident. I’m sure some macho men out there would argue about respect, honor, or whatever the fuck they want to call their pride…but the punch line here is no one “won” this fight. Two families have suffered a huge loss. I can’t find a single angle where this was a good thing, unless we apply Darwin rules here…
So the good news is this can serve as a powerful educational example to the rest of us if we can all get our heads out of our asses.
Red Foreman, an expert in the science of identifying dumbasses
Asocial violence. This is the no shit bad stuff. I am not going to talk about asocial violence in this piece. A good starting point for you will be the following articles. A Time for Violence by Frankie Faires FF and Thoughts and Opinions on defending your life – ATG.
Many people are investing time, resources, and a lot of effort in order to prepare for violence in their lives. A lot of this is wasted as too many people are focusing on the application of violence, not on awareness or social skills that allows us to prevent violence. A truly substantial amount of time is spent with people training for anti-social violence, like boxing it out at the local watering hole. This is incredibly stupid, see above example. better yet, I’ll share another one for you.
UK, 2011. Man #1 (defendant) is enjoying a beer or six at a pub watching a sports game. Man #2 is seated at the same pub at a table, about to enjoy a meal. #1 is drunk and excited, notes #2 seated across from him. #1 walks over to #2, and strikes him in the face. According to eye witnesses, #2 did not get up, or raise his hands. #1 strikes #2 again in the face, and then leaves the pub. #2 goes home, at some point goes to sleep. The next day his parents check up on him, and he has not yet woke up. #2 can’t wake up, because he is in a coma. He spends 9 days in a hospital, then dies from his head wounds. #1 probably didn’t think he would be going to court to defend him self against murder charges for punching someone in the head.
STUPID! Wasteful! Once again, no winners here. Two families suffer a tremendous loss, and yet so many idiots will read this and completely miss the fucking point.
VIOLENCE HURT, VIOLENCE KILLS.
The application of violence is incredibly simple. If you believe you need 5 years in the dojo in order to hurt someone – you are incorrect. While it is accurate to say human beings are pretty resilient animals, we are also extremely easy to damage.
Considering a 1 out of every 138 Americans is in prison, we can see more people are hurting each other than there are people learning martial arts or combative techniques. The most dangerous people in the world are not the ones who know how to hurt you the worst. The most dangerous people are the ones who are WILLING to hurt you more than you are willing to hurt them.
Learning to get out of head locks or throw a punch is not self defense. So what is?
Awareness. Interaction. Prediction. Comprehension.
Remember those four words.
Awareness is the back bone of self preservation.
I have a few questions for you:
- How many people were at the gas station parking lot last time you filled up your tank?
- In your neighborhood, where do the majority of crimes occur? I mean in YOUR neighborhood, like the immediate 1/2 mile radius around your home.
I do not expect you to have a count of the people, or to know the exact numbers. I would be impressed if you noticed the other people there. I would be really impressed if you did know what the problem street by you is. I ask that question to get you to think.
If I had to make a generalized statement about the people I see day to day when I am traveling about Minneapolis and the greater metro area: they are in a fucking fog. It’s not a MN thing, it’s situation normal for the USA. People seem to have no interest in paying attention to the things happening all around them.
So when I work with people, my very first game to boost their awareness is very simple. The game is self dialog. It is simply describing to yourself everything you are seeing when you are out.
- How many people are around you right now?
- What are they doing?
- What do they look like? height, hair color, dress, anything stand out? tattoos? scars?
- How many vehicles are in the area? Who do you see in those vehicles?
- Does anything stand out as unusual?
- How many ways in and out of the area can you perceive right now?
- Do you see anything which you perceive as hazardous?
Do this in various areas, and test yourself after you leave the area. For example sit in a diner and note these details. Once you leave see how many details you can recall. Rather than write this off as useful or dumb, try it for a week and then decide.
Click on this: Tony Blauer’s Cerebral Self Defense. This is hands down the best 15 dollars you will spend to learn about the topic. Buy it, and put it in your car. Listen to it every day for a week on your travels about town. Be warned it will make you think, and likely get you to stop doing so many dumb ass careless things day to day.
Interaction
Social Skills: another example of how much an asshole Smith was
Do you understand how to communicate with people? How would you rate your ability to read peoples faces, their posture, and their mannerisms?
Just as you learned in high school, the greatest majority of signals are sent in nonverbal channels. WHAT someone says is not as important as HOW it was said, and what posture the person was in, and their body language.
Do you know what a micro-expression is? It appears our brain doesn’t really have that solid of a grasp of our facial features, our emotions and thoughts are pouring out of the seams all the time. Do you know how to read micro-expressions?
The more you understand about human communication, the safer you potentially will be. Your awareness of people will drastically improve.
Prediction
Two things which you can know which can completely change the outcome of an event- what is the most dangerous course of action, and what is the most likely course of action.
Your ability to predict the outcome of an event will hinge on several pieces of information. Some of the factors are motivation, intentions, and capabilities of all parties involved. Understanding the path of least resistance is another. This is a massive subject, and it’s certainly a better use of your time to learn and use than a new spin kick or a new arm bar.
One thing I can always count on in a SD class- I create situations and ask people “what do you think will happen?” and they just shrug their shoulders and say I dunno. What a terrible waste of your impressive brain- you can’t even guess?
Don’t be that person. Learn the science of prediction. Need a starting point? Game Theory.
Comprehension
As in: “Understanding when you are at the cross roads of some bad shit” which is an incredibly useful realization to have. In combat we refer to three factors which drive the outcome of the battle- Speed, Surprise, and Violent action. The sooner you understand what is happening, the faster you can act. You can move from “inaction” to “reaction” and from there to “In Action”.
Surprise takes many forms. The more you understand the fewer things which will surprise you. When you are aware and predictive even fewer things will surprise you. The first steps have already been provided to you.
The final thought here- accept what you are experiencing and get acting. Yes, you are being followed. Yes, your front door did just open. Yes, that was a window breaking. Yes, he does have a knife.
Stop telling yourself things are not happening. While I can be some what accurate to say your reality is whatever you think it is, wishing someone was not about to stomp your ass flat in to the concrete won’t make it so. Accept whatever you see, hear, smell, and feel as exactly what it is- happening to you right now.
Back to the beginning
Don't be a dumbass, it's a core belief of mine
As I said- we can sort a lot of violence in three areas
-Crimes of opportunity
-Crimes you got your ass in to
-Asocial violence
If you become aware, you may stop doing stupid shit
-Leaving your car unlocked
-Walking alone at night in places where you know violence occurs
-Being around the primary fuel sources for violence – Drugs and Alcohol
-You may start to notice the people who look like they’re up to something.
-You may spot the ones who seem to be having some issues
As your social skills or interactions improve
-You may find yourself “hearing” more of what is being said around you
-You’re less likely to get tricked
-You’re less likely to be surprised
Violence is not a joke.
If you are reading this page, I know some things about you.
#1 you are not dead
#2 you have a computer, which means you’re probably not in prison right now.
There are a whole host of situations involving violence where the BEST case end result is one of you is dead and the other goes to prison. If you start a fight, or allow yourself to be drawn in to a situation where you should have walked, you can be killed. Or you may kill someone and spend the next 10-life in a cell.
Target Focus Training Group has a saying which I really find to be a perfect fit here- “Violence is not the answer but when it is the answer it is the only answer.” It’s a two fold message. #1 do not use violence unless you absolutely have to. #2 If you absolutely must use violence, then do so immediately.
I do not see much point in someone seeking physical skills if they are unwilling to learn these skills. You’re chances of fighting your way out a situation you didn’t even realize was building around are dropped by every second that you do not understand what is happening.
Drop the apathy, get aware.
Pay attention to the world around.
Figure this stuff out.
ATG
By The Way, Want in on the Smarter Strength E Class? CLICK HERE NOW
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There were 5 people at the gas station excluding myself. 1 cashier, 3 guys pumping gas; 1 guy with an older black jeep and a kid inside, another guy with a newer black jeep, and a guy with a silver SUV. The guy across from my pump with the older black jeep was wearing a black shirt/blue jean shorts a hat and had a goatee, the other guys looked military and I was less than a mile from the base (so they were assessed as a non-threat). That was a week ago. Most of the crime in my neighborhood happens within a stones throw of my house but it has been easing up lately, I haven’t seen a cop since yesterday (aside from the one that lives down the street).
Yep, I’m covered, oh and I carry a gun and a really nice knife for the unexpected.
Chris I would bet you’re the kind of dude I would want to grab a tall dark Irish stout with.
Posted as it may be of interest and I think its nice to give something back rather than just come and read all the time:-
http://www.wslwingchun.my/personal-protection-concepts-for-survival-in-the-street
One thing too many people do is listening to music outdoors with their earbuds on. That could get you fall for a surprise attack as you can’t hear the sounds near you! As much as I love listening to music outdoors, I don’t do it much anymore. Better be safe than dead!
For ear buds, the worst thing I see is that a lot of people with them also walk with their heads down, and probably their hands in the pockets, ignoring what’s around them. I don’t walk city streets with buds in, but you see it often, and a friend/coworker got mugged because of this in combination with other enabling actions (walking late at night- she got rapidly jumped by three guys as she passed a bus stop- she was lucky it was lit on other sides, since they just knocked her down, took her stuff and ran).
Exactly.
The earbuds thing is wider than violence. People often seem to like running the volume up. This means that they are less likely to hear warnings (get out of the way) or hear vehicles about to run them over etc. Earbuds are very close to the ear and if they are up loud they run 95-105 decibels. A few minutes every day at this volume inevitably results in hearing loss over a decade or 2. Ironically, the sort of hearing loss effects frequencies unevenly and so will eventually result in a reduced ability to listen to music
Another awesome post, Adam. Yours is probably my favorite blog in my RSS feed not only because of the subject matter but also because of the quality (not to mention length) of your posts. Not rehashed crap you can find anywhere, but thoughtful, articulate positions.
I can’t agree more with the distinction between possessing the physical skills of “combat” or violence, and possessing the four mental skills outlined above.
I think that many of the dumbasses described above had no proper combat skills at all but instead are, well just dumbasses. Ironically, I’ve found that the more you train (grappling, boxing, etc.) the less of a dumbass you become. I don’t know whether you become innately more attuned to the non-dumbass skills, or if it’s just a matter of getting out your physical aggression on the mats in a controlled environment, or if getting your ass handed to you time and time again in a safe, intentional manner takes away the urge to start some bullshit, but the times where I’ve seen bar brawls to go down, the people involved were completely untrained (and conversely, no one I know that trains has ever been in a bar brawl).
Also your point about accepting what you perceive is happening is crucial. I don’t read it to mean that you have to start going berserk, frightening your family (or worse, firing shots), but I’ve been in a lot of situations where some kind of disturbance to your environment was reacted to by people by freezing and simply wondering what the disturbance was.
Awesome post man!
Adam, another great post. I love reading your stuff and look forward to all the new posts. This sort of piggy backs on an article from USCCA called You Can Shoot…But Can You Fight? Written by Steve Collins. Not sure it’s publicly viewable or if it’s behind a paywall.
The only part that I have an issue with is the line, “Considering a 1 out of every 138 Americans is in prison, we can see more people are hurting each other than there are people learning martial arts or combative techniques.”
Most Americans are in jail for Malum Prohibitum crimes such as drug possession. Not because they were violent or committed a crime that had an actual victim like murder, rape, robbery, etc. Equating violence with drug possession is only possible because of the government war on personal freedom which artificially creates a market of scarcity and makes the product worth committing violence for.
If people want to harm themselves, it’s none of my business.
Jeremy, upon reflection of those numbers I would imagine you’re right- most offenders are in prison due to other than violent offenses. Maybe that was not the best number to pull. I wonder how many are incarcerated due to violent offenses?
It’s a little outdated but the DOJ keeps stats for the types of crimes. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/pub/pdf/fccp00.pdf
From October 1999 to September 2000, 4,250 were arrested for violent crime, whereas 32,630 were arrested for drug offenses. These are arrests, I haven’t found a stat for those that are in prison. But at that arrest ratio, it makes you wonder how many in prison are for violent offenses, and how many for other stuff.
The “War on Drugs” is the stupidest fucking money furnace of our time. I understand the FED running down Coke dealers, but allotting the multi-millions of dollars to throw people smoking pot in jail is absurd. One year in prison costs taxer payers over 34K per prisoner. How many millions are being burnt for some dickhead who got caught with a dime bag?
Weed and prostitutes, make them legal, tax em hard = less people in jail + more money for schools (and other important stuff). Win win.
I am glad you picked up this topic again to blog about….I thought it over & the sad truth is even someone like me (small person, avoids conflict, good instincts) has been involved in two disturbing physical confrontations in one decade. I credit extreme good luck and a small bit of instruction in self-defense for getting out of those situations.
I also loved OB’s link. Worth a read.
I agree with it all. I remember studying TFT videos years back. If you get nothing more that the mindset you need if a situation becomes truly violent, then its well worth it. But I’m happy to say now that I am training in martial arts that takes the principles of awareness, calibration, escalation of force and much more into account.
Actually, one of the things I liked about my time in a local kung fu studio was that my sifu was all about not getting into stupid scrapes in the first place. He was careful to always point out that you could win the fight, but lose the lawsuit.
And you are right – human beings are incredibly easy to damage, and anyone can do it with a 2×4 or a tire iron – 5 years of dojo training is not required.
Excellent post, keep up the good work!
I love The Matrix. I love Agent Smith.
Great stuff Adam.
that pic makes me laugh every time, i think i will post it at least quarterly
Growing up around poor/middle class areas/demographics helped my situational awareness—seeing people stabbed and shot can do that for a person. Sheltered demographics are so clueless to reality, but youtubing terms such as “sucker punch” is an eye opener for people like this.
Everything you’ve said is so true. Once you have situational awareness (and physical fitness), you will notice you have many ways to avoid outright conflict. In fact, you can challenge yourself in social situations where alcohol is involved to go out of your way to avoid potential situations with thugs/drunks without loosing face. My friend was a master at phychology. One time he was surrounded by dudes wanting to beat his ass and he said, “Shit man. I can’t fight without my favorite slippers, man!” He then turned his anger at his friends saying,”How could you guys let me forget my favorite slippers? You guys aren’t my friends anymore,” and walked away. The group was so unprapared for something like this that they let him walk away and no fight happened. We all new we were hopelessly outnumbered, and my friend new that simply running away would not have worked. Be creative. I believe that Bauer guy you liked to gave a creative example at an ATM machine. If you notice people might be planning on jumping you while at the ATM, hit the cancel button, hit the maching and say, “What do you man insufficient funds?!!!” and walk away mad.
Shane
Tony said in his CD “Those who talk can be persuaded to walk” and that seems to be very true. Most people require you to provide them with the fuel to fight you. Many people could get walking in a conflict situation by running their minds, not their mouths.
I wish that I read this article earlier in life. I trained in iron hand for a while… granted the confidence in myself grew bar none, but then I realized “What if I had to hit some dumbass one day. Is it going to be one hit, one kill, then I get jail time because I killed someone?” Many martial arts are left in antiquity sheerly because of tradition, not practicality. Many of these skills were useful in feudal times, when a war lord could come into your small village and slaughter everyone, but not because some dumbass called you a faggot or is looking to brawl because he is in a drunken rage.
I can’t agree more that people need to get out of the daze and into the surroundings. I live in Atlanta and most of the violence in my area occurs about three blocks away in and by two dance clubs and the train station. There are generally two to three homeless people sleeping in the areas, no police, and a lot of drunken angry assholes. Regardless to say… I generally avoid that area like the plague after dark. If someone is setting themself up for failure then it should be no surprise when they fail. The reverse is also true that if they set themselves up to win and persist at it then it should come to no surprise when they succeed! BTW I’m reposting this article.
p.s.- Adam, when you said “The “War on Drugs” is the stupidest fucking money furnace of our time…” I was surprised because I was under the impression that you were pretty right winged. To build onto that I want to say that we, the U.S., has the highest incarceration rate in the industrialized world!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37u3sPHjrro
Matt
I will do a write up on it this month. I would agree I am right wing, but I have some problems with the complete fail we have seen over the last 20 years.
Left wing… right wing. Doesn’t really matter though, because we’re all getting bent over and fucked the same way.
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