Perspective

Please look over the list below and tell what the common relationship and interaction of the following words is to you:

• Truth
• False
• Fact
• Lie
• Believe
• Good
• Bad
• Evil
• Unacceptable
• Excellent
• Fair

I ask people this often, and only a few people have answered it the same way I do.

What all of these words represent is an idea of how things should be. Another way to say that is these are all opinions.

Opinions are what shape people. That is of course my opinion.

We all have a world view. For many that world view is the sum of their experiences, education, injury, hopes, dreams, successes and failures.

Not all events are created equally. Not all experiences carry the same weight. How (if) something affects a person is a fairly individualize factor. While most people share similar experiences, our opinion on the experience is often very different.

Once again, that is all my opinion.

Another way to view opinions is using the idea of belief systems.

A belief system can be described as the manifestation of an opinion which facilitates or inhibits action. That is of course my opinion and my current definition which I am operating with.

The value and impact of a given belief system can be graded by how well we are able to act, and the degree of flexibility in the options of response when faced with a problem/situation/issue/conflict relating to the belief system.

An example:

I know people who say that there is no reason for violence in this world, and they would absolutely refuse to participate in violence as it is “beneath them”

I on the other hand see violence as a tool, and an incredibly useful tool at that for solving very specific problems. Not only do I believe there is a specific series of situations in which violence is an option, I also see various situations where violence is the only option.

Now, who is currently owning a more useful belief system? Depends.

I have first hand experienced a wide variety of violent situations, some of which were incredibly horrifying. My opinion was forged under observation and participation.

Someone who has not been there may be able to draw a different conclusion. In many ways I feel as if there was little choice in the matter for me, and the other people who were there at the time (see that is a belief system too).

Let me give you an example of how that all can play out.

Someone assaults me, I have options. The person with the other belief system may not.

Someone unlawfully enters my home. I have options. Other people may not.

Someone is harming someone else and I choose to stop it. I have options. Other people with a different belief system may not.

We have belief systems (opinions) for everything we do, everything we think, everything we are involved in.

Think about it for a moment, is there anything which you do not currently have an opinion on?

Now that you have, do you think your available responses are serving you to the maximum degree? At the surface you may instantly say “Yes, of course. Why would I believe something that is not?”

Why indeed?

Well for starters many of your opinions are not yours. Not really.

The foundation of our world is set as little kids. The influences cast upon us deliberately or indirectly can manifest in ways which people battle for their entire life. This can be a useful or defeating gravity on a person throughout their existence.

I believe a lesson like “you are worthless” can be destructive to a person, but so can “you are special.”

Of course there are many other factors.

School, jobs, church, sports, hobbies, and relationships of all kinds. Music, movies, and media.

I think people will “borrow” someone elses belief system to fill a gap once discovered when they have not had a stimulus to form their own.

To that end, if it is accurate, many of your opinions are not yours at all.

So what? Why would that be a problem?

“That should happen” can slow you down, and so can “that should never happen” provided either of these are tied to something reducing your adaptability.

• “that is bad!”
• “that is good”
• “People are good deep down”
• “that was evil”
• “I deserve this”
• “I can’t believe this is happening”
• “I would never do that!”
• “I always do that”
• “That is impossible”
• “That is supposed to happen”

Can you see how each one of these ideas limits you? Can you understand how by adapting any one of these ideas reduces your options of response?

Sensation and action are coupled. This was one of the first psychology lessons Frankie ever taught me. Sensation is highly blurred with belief systems and opinions. This can mean the associated action to a given sensation will either be impaired or enhanced by the belief system you have own related to the event.

So with all this said, here’s an opinion.

Examine all of your belief systems. Look for ones which limit your options. Look for areas where by changing your mind could change your life. Ask yourself two more questions

• “What is the cost of changing this belief system?”
• “What is the benefit of changing it?”

You are the only person who is truly qualified to address those questions. While it maybe useful to ask experts in the respective areas what they think, you must keep your hand on the wheel. It is your life.

If you can do that, you can get better faster.

I will leave you with a quote which has helped me make a lot of change in my life,

“In order to know the answer to anything, you must be willing to question everything”

-Frankie Faires